Dear Blog, I sit and wonder sometimes who’s in charge in life. I don’t mean totally in charge, because that of course would be God and the like, though I sometimes wonder if there really is one. I like to think there is. I mean, am I in charge of my own destiny, or are they? By they I mean all the people who exist outside of my world, my reality. I know everything that goes on in my mind, and in fact that things go on. It is extremely hard for me to imagine others thinking. I see myself, and I am able to see into myself, my eyes, my spirit. I look onto another and see only a body. However, I sense that they must think also, just as I do. I can see a liveliness, a personality, and a vitality, if you will, within their sparkling eyes. When I long to catch His eye, it seems as though he is in total control, withholding his perfect soul from mine. It is only when he looks that we meet, not when I desire it. It is as if I have all the pages but he holds all the words. His eyes seem to dance inside his head, laughing at me, teasing me, knowing that he has all the power. Or…have I wasted all this text? Do I… hold the power? ¤M
May 12, 2005
Articulated Jargon 